Appalled!

Appalled!

I’m appalled! By what, you ask. By the fact that I suck at parenting.

I always thought I would rock motherhood. I’ve worked with kids my entire

life. I love kids and they love me back. I took like 9,000 parenting classes

and child development. I should be ready for anything when it comes to

these kids. Well guess what, none of that helped. I laugh a lot as a parent,

I would say that’s a good thing but mostly it’s to keep from crying. Like how

did these little humans come from something so great and turn out to be

them. NOT SORRY! I nurtured these kids, gave them the best I could. I had

them natural because I wanted to be at my best when they made it into this

world. I breastfeed them. I loved and hated that. My boobs still hurt just

thinking about it. I always told them what was going on, even before they

could understand. I would say mommy is leaving to go to work but I will be

back, I love you so much. As they got older and they would cry I would let

explain what they felt and why. They didn’t many spanking either. I would

get down or their level and tell them that it was not okay to act out and yell

out in the store, and then most likely distract them. I would apologize when

I was wrong. All the things I could never get growing up and look at me not.

Feeling like my mama probably felt, lost. How is this possible you are such

a great mom? You are wondering (lol) I know I know. I’m here to tell you

there is no perfect way to parent. So even if you do everything right as I did,

you will still not get perfect children. ( and if you do, screw you this not for

you) Children have their own journeys to take and we can not stop that no

matter how hard we try. I do what I think is right and that’s all you can do.

Teach what you want them to learn but you can’t force them to get it. I’m

done trying to be perfect, where my belt at? Who are you to judge me? HA

I pray

I pray

Dear God,

Please protect my children.

Protect them from the streets, from themselves and anyone against them.

God, give them the wisdom and knowledge to make it in this crazy world.

Help them to feel your presence whenever they need you and help them to bold so they may call on you when they are in trouble.

Help them to not lean on their own understanding, because Lord not everything makes sense to the human mind.

Dear God,

Help my children be gentle and kind to others.

Help them to be leaders or followers of those who do good.

Please give them the confidence to be themselves.

Lord, help them to love in difficult situations. Let them be a light to the world so they may drive out darkness.

All these things I pray in Jesus name, Amen.